Day 528: Reflections on the Daily Blog

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Sometimes it can be hard to know what the hell you’re doing with something until you get to a point where you’ve done it long enough that the inherent benefits suddenly seem more clear. 

I’ve often wondered why I decided to write a daily blog, given the fact I don’t advertise it whatsoever -aside from the handful of people on my son’s Facebook page. I haven’t tried to monetize it or turn it into anything in any way, and it’s really about nothing other than my reactions to the daily events of my own life. 

Essentially it’s become an online journal.

Note: I’m dictating this as I walk around outside and just said “comma” out loud. This is one of the reasons I don’t dictate, as speaking punctuation out loud takes away from the natural flow of verbal communication. This isn’t dragon dictate software however, and I’m only recording the entry, to be transcribed later, so theres no need for me to be saying 'comma' at all, but it’ll take some getting used to. If I keep it up at all. 

I do like the idea of dictating the blog just for that reason. There’s more flow. I’m a very verbal person and as I continue to work on the memory stuff, and write, I’m beginning to organize my thoughts much better ‘on the fly’ which will make this entire process much more enjoyable. At least, such is my hope. 

So the daily blog…

It’s good to keep a semi-recorded track of your own life. It’s what most of us do anyway, with our social media accounts. The blog is just a more reflective way of doing that. Certainly more wordy! I don’t give many status-type updates, I just tell you as much as I can remember and get it out all at once, for a span of 30 minutes or so, at some point throughout the day. 

I try to keep it short and relatively readable for the consistent people out there who check out what I’m up to, but sometimes I just have to get shit out.  

You know how it is. 

I appreciate anybody at all who drops in to see what I’m up to these days, given how busy everyone is and how I virtually walked away from an entire other life; certainly an entire other mode of thinking, and as such, haven’t had a lot of contact with the majority of my former friends and acquaintances. I suppose this is another way of saying, “hey, don’t worry about me. I may be utterly outmatched living out in the wilderness with no discernible man skills whatsoever… but I’m a gamer.”

Also, when one attaches oneself to the banner of atheism for so long and then has a sudden and shocking reversal in one’s thinking and understanding; both of oneself, and the world at large, you tend to see things in an entirely new light, I can assure you. That new perspective takes a while to sink in, the roots requiring some spins around the sun to dig down, solidify and create a base strong enough for something sturdy and far reaching to spring up. This can be as upending an experience for the people around you.

I was one of the "good atheists" of course, for most of my life, though I’ve certainly made my fair share of mistakes. And of course I have, having been wandering the wasteland for 20 years or so, with no anchor!

Still, I’m confident that if you ask almost… I’d say… 95% of the people I’ve encountered in life they will relate rather pleasant dealings with me; though I do fully recognize that if they were friends or ex's that I no longer speak to that means there was, towards the end, likely a certain pang of emotion experienced that from my perspective at least -the only one I can know- varied wildly from person to person. 

No matter. 

Water under the bridge as they say.

No hard feelings here, hopefully none on the other end of those few dangling strings out there either. Who can say?  

It certainly hasn’t been my intention to detach from anything I can assure you. The process seems to be a familiar one for many people, the more I look into similar ‘experiences’ to try to triangulate my own thinking, and was merely the result of my individual path, a path that was a long one; taking me from this place to that place, putting me with this group, then that group, then no group, and now the group; the human group. 

This is what now allows me to live quite happily out in the middle of the woods, when my whole life I avoided a sedentary lifestyle like this like the plague! 

I’m an idiot. 

I just realized that as I’m walking around the yard dictating this while the patio door to our bedroom is open. The very pregnant and somewhat irritable Jeannette, suffering from the heat that has descended upon this mountain like the hot breath of a wild-fire, is trying to sleep. 

So she’s sleeping up there and I’m yapping on to you guys down here. 

Oh boy. 

I suppose I’ve done my damage for this entry at least, making this about five minutes of reading for my readers. That’s the goal I think I’m starting to formulate: Five minutes per night. 

A “tight” five. 

It’s some jargon from my amateur and then later television taped standup days. Everyone is always looking for a ‘tight five’. Do you have a tight five minutes? With a set that will kill no matter what room you’re put into, with any crowd?? 

The reason is that anyone will listen to you for five minutes if they like you in the first 30 seconds. The hardest part of your job as a performer, teacher, communicator or hell, as a person in this world, is that you then have to give them a reason to listen to you for five more. 

Perhaps that’s become the motto of the blog, discovered in the midst of this free flowing style I’m employing as I walk among the rubble that is my back yard; riddled with downed trees and brush and other general disarray, with an angry Jeannette above me trying to sleep away the heat. 

Tight five. 

If someone is interested in anything I’m talking about to the point where they would like to learn or hear more, they will someday have those options, in good order. 

Branches and stems. 

Just like the Chinese Zodiac, an ancient system of star gazing in which I happen to be… a Fire Dragon. Nothing will get you from thinking astrology is horseshit to saying, 'hey, there might be something to this stuff after all babe," like finding out you were born a fire dragon.

Okay, I’ve prattled on long enough. The other issue with dictating these in real time throughout the day is that I will often be distracted and pulled from the point of what I started out writing. I suppose that will also be part of the fun in doing it this way, for you. You’ll get to watch my brain either continue along it’s path of distracted wandering, or watch as I whip it into shape and become a lean mean dictating, tight five crafting machine. 

Either way, buckle up. 

Nite munks.

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