Day 496: Poppy's New Phone


Well would you look at this, 11:17pm and the clunky internet is still up and running, puttering along like the Little Engine That Could.. barely.. putter.

I'm shocked and invigorated by the fact that if I had to I could reach any one of you, instantaneously, via my phone or computer. If the scenario called for it, we could even Skype for a more intimate face to face type chat. Thankfully, I can't imagine anything happening that would require us to connect suddenly, but it's nice to know I could reach you all if I needed. 

It's like being stranded on a raft with an aircraft carrier travelling parallel to you; far enough away that they don't block your light but close enough that if you need them you can wave your arms and get some help.

It was a decent day, now that I look back at it. We got up relatively early thanks to Hubble barking his face off for no apparent reason whatsoever, but took it pretty easy until it was time to head out to Jeannette's doctors appointment. Despite her gestational diabetes "label" she is measuring perfectly fine in all her tests and has yet to have any high blood sugar readings. So we literally went into the office, heard the heartbeat for twenty seconds, got Jeannette weighed and measured up; like we were at a dairy farm -in the most respectful way as possible I'll add- and off we went to meet up with my grandfather regarding his new phone. 

So here's the deal. We had to meet him at the Nissan dealership where he had taken his car in for sub-standard performance -it was the only place we could catch him. When I got there he was in mid-conversation with the manager of the store who was trying to explain away the issue he's having with his vehicle, a shaky steering wheel -a problem I also have- but for my grandfather such things are insufferable and he made his case well known to the man he spoke with as Jeannette and I settled into the waiting room. 

At that point one of the Nissan salesmen came over to say hello. We bought our TV from him last year at Future Shop. The now defunct Future Shop I should say. We loved this guy, he put up with all our nonsense and questions when we went in there looking to furnish our house last year. Granted, he got a pretty kick ass commission -if that's how Future Shop worked- but we were still a pretty large handful that he handled very well. We also bonded over the fact that he has four kids; a fact that was shocking considering how young he looks. 

Anyway, Jeannette asked him if the company had informed those guys before shutting down. They hadn't. It was one of his friends that had called him and asked him if the store was shutting down, considering he'd gone in and found the doors closed up and signs saying that it was going to be closing. That's how he found out he'd need to be looking for a job. I'm not sure how companies expect to survive when they treat people like that. 

When my grandfather had finally convinced the manager to go for a drive with him to see what he was talking about, he was ready to get down to business regarding his iPhone with me. But then, it wasn't an iPhone, it was a Nokia contraption with a Windows operating system that I am altogether not familiar with. Poppy said they'd told him he was getting an iPhone. The only reason I haven't gone down there already to give them shit for trying to rip off a senior citizen.., is because it could have just as well been him that just assumed all phones with big screens are iPhones. He's quite savvy with the iPad, but when it comes to phones pretty much anything but a motorola razor is witchcraft and voodoo to him. 

In the end we decided it was for the best that he just give it to me to take home and deal with, along with a stack of papers with login's and passwords and a very short list of apps that he'd like to have access to. He didn't seem to be in a very big hurry to get it back, something I found a little surprising, until we found out that his lady friend told him she didn't want him playing around with it while he was spending time with her at the house. She seems to think people spend too much on their phones and it keeps them from interacting with people around them. I don't disagree with her. 

So we'll see where this phone excursion goes, but so far it seems already to be less extreme than the first iPhone a few months ago. And then there's the no contract thingy.. which is good. The only problem is that I now have to learn how this little Nokia works, when I haven't even really finished getting mine sorted out. Grim.

In other grim news, I have a click in my knee. Clicks are no good, in case you were on the fence. Clicks are bad. Clicks are little bits of organic matter snapping and popping together in decidedly disorderly fashion inside the only body that you have access to. Not painful, thankfully. Just a sign of my declining Ninja Warrior years. Another painful remnant resurfacing from a time when I put skates on, and hockey gear, and went out onto a frozen surface to keep a little rubber disk away from the bad men who wanted to hurt me.. and their occasional fans who would try to spit on me.

Oh it happened. There were incidents.
It was high school. Shit happens. 

Anyway, we'll see what this brings. Thankfully I have no plans on being physical any time soon, as evidenced by the gym membership I just bought... wait... oh, balls :( 

I've got a long way to go before I'm 94 years old inside some kind of jet-car dealership arguing with the manager over the 'cloud' softness of my hover-chair, as my grandson helps sort out my new iPhone.., you know the one, the implant, with the direct visual projection of a holographic Steve Jobs guiding you throughout your day while constantly trying to get you to meet his guru.

Okay, I've written enough.

Surely I've written enough for you people?! Are you not entertained???
It's day 496! In a row!
Words and thoughts and sentences strewn together... for what purpose??

...I don't know... we'll see.

But a comic strip seems to be a brew'in. I heard a rumour. From my very own mouth. Just the other day, and by that I mean today. I even did some doodles. Some doodles that became much more determined drawings. Drawings that reached a point of amusement for both me and the other around me to make me think I might have something worthwhile.. and then became unpleasant later when I tried to bring it to life in Photoshop. 

No matter. Baby steps. Like Blaze.

I'm as easy on myself nowadays as I am on my son. He diligently crawls around the house picking up this and that, fiddling with it, analyzing it, tasting it, smashing it on the nearest other object, and then moving on to investigate further. Investigate what? For what purpose, asks everyone that watches him. To look at the world. The stuff in it. To climb over obstacles, with limbs you don't even have full control over, and knees that click, for the sole purpose of moving forward.

Because you know, just by watching EVERY kid in the world grow up, if you just keep picking up the things that happen to interest you, and fiddle with them long enough, and with enough focus, you to will eventually be able to one day not shit your pants. 

There was probably a more inspiring ending there, like; grow up and run, or dance and sing or blah blah blah, but at this point in the night, with my body feeling like it does, and my knee clicking, I'd take a night of not shitting my pants and consider myself quite fortunate. I don't know about you.

But that would be one indignity I don't think the organism could handle at this point in the game! 

Tomorrow we have another baby appointment. And I will learn a phone.