Day 0283 #Recap

122019. #BorgBaby

122019. #BorgBaby

2130. Who needs sleep?

I'll tell you who... suckers. Suckers need sleep. Not me. Certainly not me. Which is good, because I don't seem to even really have the option.

More ass kicking by the wee one last night. As a result, daddy is dealing with about 30% of the neural capacity in his grey matter he's used to having.  

I almost had him figured out last night. Oh yeah, quite nearly had a breakthrough worthy of bragging to you lot about. But then it all came crashing down around me again.  

I was feeding him in the room last at around midnight while Jeannette got ready for bed when the thought occurred to me. Instead of waiting for him to wake up in the night shrieking for food like an insane berserker, why not set the alarm for two hours and forty five minutes from that moment, get up, get his bottle ready, and bring it to Jeannette who can then wake him up and feed him BEFORE he flips out?


And it worked too. My alarm went off, I wearily walked downstairs, got it all ready, brought it to Jeannette and bam, victory was mine.  

I then set my alarm for three hours later and went back to bed.  

But I couldn't get back to sleep. And just after I finally did he woke up, a good fifteen minutes before the alarm went off. And the vicious cycle repeated. Sonofa...

I can't beat this kid. There's no getting ahead of him. He's always one step ahead of me. He's like a tiny version of the Borg. He adapts to any techniques used against him. It's like he wants to shriek! 

fast forward an hour... 

We're at Jeannette's brothers place tonight. Our gypsy ways continue. A new night, a new bed. Although at least we're able to sleep in the same bed again. Like an actual couple!

We were here when I started this entry of course, I just hadn't gotten to that part yet when a conversation with her brother Tony, and the tail end of Meet the Millers derailed the writing. 

We're now trying to figure out the sleeping arrangements as the little terrorist is splayed out in the middle of the bed and Jeannette and I stand over him trying to figure out how to slide in without waking him up.

Maybe I'll just curl up in the play pen and crash for the night. Lock into a solid fetal position, pop the thumb in the mouth, and head off to sleepy land. Oh shit, I'd do it too, if I thought he'd sleep.  

Honestly, who's in charge here??  I wonder sometimes. 

He hasn't eaten in a couple of hours now which means by the time we get settled and fall asleep he'll be just about ready to get up and start screaming at us to do his belly's bidding.

This is grim.  

He's near the three month mark which we're told often ushers in a significant growth spurt. Which means he'll eat even more than he has been and will no doubt be even more demanding than usual. 

It also has the dangerous chance of setting off a chain reaction as Tony has a five year old and a two year old that likely won't sleep through the auditory assault and may feel the sudden shrieking is something they too should get on board with as well. 

We could have a full on toddler mutiny on our hands tonight. I can't speak for anyone else but this guy right here is ill equipped to handle it; energy levels being what they currently are.  

Grim indeed.  

If we can just survive the night, we have a date day being provided to us tomorrow. Cat, Tony's wife, has volunteered to watch Blaze for the day if mommy and daddy would like to go out and do something.

Funny how even that sweet, sweet promise of a momentary respite in the day to day battle with the infant didn't inspire us to come up with a single plan of action.  

To be honest I'd take an entire day of sleeping. For sure! I'd completely write off the 20th of December. In a heart beat. No questions asked. Sleep from now to Sunday morning if I could.  

But that won't happen. That's the only downside of not being in an actual coma state, you can still hear. And who among us can listen to a baby wail and not get up to help calm him down?? Not I. Especially when good ol' daddy is often the only one who can do it!  

If he wasn't so damn cute this would all be a lot harder. But even with the exhaustion and the fact I have yet to do a lick of work, I still wouldn't have it any other way. The kid is a gem.  

Well that's it for tonight. A quick entry for a long day. And look at that, I didn't mention North Korea once tonight.  


Nite munks. /mp